Tuesday, May 25

a new ARPIT AND BLOODBATH cartoon!
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Arpit and his best friend Bloodbath the unemployed pirate captain stand outside their apartment complex. It's sunny and nice outside.

"You want a pesto and ice cream taco, Bloodbath?" asks Arpit.

"No thanks," says Bloodbath.

"But it's Eat Far Too Many Pesto and Ice Cream Tacos Day," says Arpit. "And you haven't eaten even one. Catch the spirit, buddy."

"I think I can appreciate them more on the outside of my digestive system."

"That's some fake right there. You have to chew food and smoosh it on your toungue to taste it and appreciate it. " Arpit shoves most of a pesto and ice cream taco into his mouth. He crunches it loudly, bits of green ice cream dripping over his bumblebee shirt. "Yeah, that's the stuff."

"i love pesto and ice cream so much. it's my favorite thing in the world. I can eat it every day and all the time and never get sick of it ever. boy howdy." yells Arpit. A big grey monster walks past at just that moment and turns her head to see what Arpit is yelling about. the pirate, yelling ice-creamed boy, and the monster all exchange eye contact for a brief moment before the monster continues on her way.

"Arpit?" asks Bloodbath.

"Hm?"

"Did you see what that monster was carrying?"

"Was she carrying something?" Arpit concentrates on getting far too much of a taco in his mouth.

"Yes, she was." Bloodbath curls the tip of his curly mustache with one hand. "She was carrying a lot of sandwich items. Mayonaise, sliced cheese, bread, a squealing pig..."

"So?"

"Just hungry. I think I'll go back to the apartment and make some real food."

"Ice cream and pesto tacos are real food."

Arpit and Bloodbath walk up the stairs to their apartment. On the way up they pass by an open door. They both look in and see a small child dumping a lot of mayonaise onto a slice of bread on the floor. the child looks up and stares at the two friends questioningly. A squealing pig runs a quick circle around the child, who goes back to piling the mayonaise on his bread.

Arpit and Bloodbath are about to continue on their way when they hear a woman screaming. "Help! Help! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! OH NO! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Then a loud crunching sound, with some less loud wet smooshing sounds. Arpit shoves another half a taco into his mouth.

A red high-heeled shoe comes flying from the other room and hits the wall behind the mayonaise kid. Another one follows.

"Hey," says Arpit. "Look at all those shoes." And this is when they both realize that there are shoes all over the apartment. Lots and lots of them. And glasses. The floor of the apartment is covered in men and women's shoes and glasses. "Why are there so many shoes, Bloodbath?"

The big grey monster comes walking out just then, picking her bloody teeth with a pair of horn-rimmed glasses.

"Hey," yells Arpit. "We know you. You want a taco?"

The monster shakes her head "No" and sits down next to the child who is still building that mountain of mayonaise, the slice of bread no longer visible.

"Ma'am," nods Bloodbath to the monster. "Arpit, let's be on our way."

"Why?"

"Becusae maybe they want their privacy."

"Hey monster," yells Arpit. "How come you got so many shoes and glasses?"

the monster stands up, walks to the door, and slams it in their faces.

"Happy Eat Far Too Many Pesto and Ice Cream Tacos Day!" Arpit yells through the door. "i'm gonna leave one by the door in case she changes her mind later.

Bloodbath nods and they walk upstairs to their own apartment.

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