Saturday, December 17

The Annual Educators Field Day is something Mr. Happy Puppet Head brings me to every year. It's supposed to bring teachers and community educator-types together, and it’s always a bunch of real-type of people, with cars and polo shirts and families. None of them wear eye-masks or capes every day all the time. None of them can float and are puppets.

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I have been writing/compiling a Midnight Mailman Show Book. So that's what this particular long absence has been about. That's a work-in-progress drawing, but it probably won't be much different than that. Also it's a lot longer than that one paragraph.

Wednesday, August 3

The Olds

A very old couple is so old that one of their hands is always holding one of the other’s hands. Their fingers are like two vines that have grown into each other and can’t be pulled apart.

The very old couple never talk to each other anymore. They sit and they look at the world around them, completely happy in that way that is true.

A sketchbook sits on their shared lap and with their free hands they draw, inky black pens swirling thick lines, hands working in perfect unison, slowly and easily finishing shapes for each other like sentences, scratching depth and space with each stroke.

They live in Future Times, but they can still see the future, and they draw it. If you want to know what the next big thing will be, they can draw you a picture of it. The next big thing is Hats that are actually shoes. It makes sense in the Future Times.

Their names are Boblin and Marlin The Olds. They live in a tree that does not have a tree house in it. They sleep on branches and snore like loud crickets. They only eat oatmeal, but in great big buckets. They don’t like crossword puzzles since they’ve become so violent. In the Future Times nobody likes to dance, not since it got so violent. Murder is allowed, but only while dancing or doing the crossword.

Oh, and they can turn into Elephants, not because they are magic, but because they had that operation you can get in the Future Times that lets you turn into an elephant. It comes in super handy. It’s the only way to stampede with any real accuracy. Also, the buttons in the Future Times are really big and elephant feet are the best way to push enormous buttons.

Boblin’s favorite drink is dessert, while Marlins favorite dessert is to drink. Boblin likes flavors, while Marlin likes different flavors.

Everyone gets along in Future Times, which is why there isn’t a whole lot of dancing anymore. And the crossword puzzles pile up un-solved.

Boblin isn’t getting any younger, but it does seem that Marlin might start to. You just never know.

Thursday, April 7

Cat Surfing!

We want to go on a beach vacation, but we also want to bring our grumpy cat. I will print this comic and put it all over the house at her eye level so that she can get used to the idea.

Sunday, March 20

Chainsaw Face

Alternate punch-lines include "At least we kept the receipt," "...and with only one day until retirement..." and "Good thing my name is already Chainsaw Face."

Thursday, March 17

Wednesday, March 16

Monty's Soup and Sandwich Drive-Through Buffet, ALTERNATE ENDING!

Mollie says this ending would be funnier, and so it is.

Monty's Soup and Sandwich Drive-Through Buffet

My wife and I wrote a comic together! She's the best ever!

Tuesday, March 8

How To Draw a Frog in a Pond

I discovered that a number of people where brought to this site by Google-searching "How To Draw a Frog in a Pond." While I previously posted a drawing of a frog in a pond, nowhere on this site – until now – had an actual explanation of how it such a thing is done. I only hope that this satisfies.